Apologies

To anyone reading this post, I am not my normal self lately and I am sorry. This divorce thing is killing me. I want so badly to be and feel loved the way I deserve by the man that I married 12 1/2 years ago. I want so badly to be in love with that same person. The thing is I am way too far into this thing to back out now. I am stubborn, hard headed and proud. There is no way I could tell my daddy that I was taking him back after showing no concern for his children the way he did and leaving me with only $300.00 in the bank while he was throwing $10,000.00 away on God only knows what. He used to be my Mr. Wonderful. Now he's my Mr. Migraine. If only he would show me he was trying to do better by getting a job and treating me better, I would probably take him back if he asked. There would be lots of counseling sessions to go to, I'm sure. I'm not willing to give up my parents and my sister for someone that wouldn't give our relationship the work it needed though.